Is it good to be afraid??

If you ask this question to a MAN, then i'm sure he'll say, 'What a wuss you are? How can you be afraid, you are a man!!' This may work for most of the cases in a man's life, but not always.

Take this for the example, in India, a man gets married only after he has seen the girl, so has his family. Boy likes the Girl, Girl likes the Boy. Boy's family like the Girl's, Girl's family like the Boy's. Both the families like each other. If everything goes well, then they get married. Well this is the story in most of the cases.

But, when a Boy goes to see the girl, I'm sure all of them are in the same condition as I'm in now. I'm scared. I'm scared to death. I wasn't this sacred when I failed in my exams. I wasn't this scared, when I got caught smoking, or drinking. But I'm now. I tried convincing myself, I'm not scared!! But as the dooms day approaches, I'm getting now.

Sometimes I get up at night, suddenly, and start thinking of it. How will I meet a Girl, that too with the consent of my family.  What will I say to her? What all things I'll put up in front of her? Should I say everything, honestly? Or shouldn't I? Will it be right of me to say everything? If I'd hurt her feelings? If I do not say everything, wouldn't I be keeping her in dark? And lots of many other thing. God, I wasn't this confused my entire life. Who should I go to? Who should I say all these things? I know, who so ever I talk to for this, everyone will say their experiences. How they met the Girl? What all things they said? How it got further? And blah, blah, blah!! And at the end it's me to decide what's right. But will someone please tell me 'What is right'? It it OK to be afraid?

Capturing Drops

A New Inclination

Day by day, I see myself getting inclined to this. It's a strange feeling. A new of it's kind. This hasn't happened to me before? But this is not the question. The real question is, why now? All of a sudden? Does this happen to everyone, or is it only me?
It's not that I want to; but it's happening!!! Why? Seriously, I do not know. I'm clueless. It's like, I'm being dragged to this completly new path. And the irony is, no third person is forcing me to do so. It's me, self. Sometimes I think, It's the destiny who's calling me. But this is not what I wanted!!!
All I wanted, is a normal life. And with this new progress in my life, I think my life is not going to be normal. It's gonna change completly. A complete 360 degree turn.
But is it worth? I believe, Yes!!! It's not that I'm gonna change, or my aura. The only thing that's changing is my thinking, beliefs, lifestyle. And this change is exclusively for me.
Few days back I started reading this essay, "Why I'm an Atheist" by martyr Bhagat Singh (I haven't completed it though). It's a miracle in it's own. It's not that I'm not gonna believe in the supreme being, from now on. The thing that struck me is that, a person, so young, so pure, sacrificed his life, for our mother nation - INDIA. He believed, once free, it's people will be free too. Free to think, act, converse, live, earn, eat. But are we? Are we doing all those things what he wanted? Are we, in literal sense, liberated? NO, we are not. Day by day, we are getting entangled in our own. We are busy beautifying our own life. Not keepipng in mind there are people who do not see their teens. Those who do, they end up being so called POOR. It's not only people around us who become POOR, but it's our own Mother Nation too. Today we say India is shining. But the question here is, who in India is shining. Rich are becoming richer, poor are becoming poorer. And all this at the cost of sacrificing our environment. We are making our environment sick, by cutting trees. It's not that we aren't creating jungle. We are creating concrete jungle. Not tree jungles, but concrete jungles!!! It's not that we have started doing this now. We have been doing this since the birth of mankind. The pattern of our growth is very similar to one more livng organism on this earth. VIRUS. We first grow in an area. We grow ourselves so much, untill every single resource in that area is consumed. Once done, we spread into another area, and the chain continues. This way, we do not show any difference between us and the viruses. What should we do which discriminates us from them. Plant!! Plant more and more trees. It's high time that we do this. If it's not now, then it never will be.

20 Years Ago

A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband is not in bed. She puts on her robe and goes downstairs to look for him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in front of him. He appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall. She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of his coffee. "What's the matter, dear?", she whispers as she steps into the room, "Why are you down here at this time of night?" The husband looks up from his coffee." Do you remember 20 years ago when we were dating, and you were only 16?", he asks solemnly. "Yes I do," she replies. The husband pauses. The words are not coming easily. "Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car?" "Yes, I remember," says the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him. The husband continues: "Do you remember when he shoved the shotgun in my face and said, either you marry my daughter, or I'll send you to jail for 20 years?" "I remember that too," she replies softly. He wipes another tear from his cheek and says, "I would have gotten out today."

For A Few Dollars More

Young I was, when my mother tought'

"Being honest is the best you can do".

Followed the same, not for days,

or months,

or years.

But, till date.

Alas! Honesty didn't pay.

It has now become,

only a lesson, that kids learn.

Why being honest, is the question now.

To see mother die?

To see wife running away?

To see kids crying for a meal?

Decades later, once again,

a lesson i learnt.

Try everything, but being honest,

only, for a few dollars more.